An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from his pond, with his hand.
The farmer shouts: "Trinken Sie nicht das Wasser, die Kuhe und die Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!"
The man shouts back: "I am an American. I don't understand, nor do I care to understand your gibberish. Speak English like the constitution intended!"
The farmer shouts back in English: "Use both hands, you'll get more!"
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